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Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 5:17 pm
by Padfoot
I'm glad about the leftovers, because mom is at the hospital now. We knew beforehand that she had to go, so we were prepared. She has a bladder tumo that had to be removed, and we're still waiting for the results. We hope to have them by Tuesday. The surgery was on Wednesday, and she is doing surprisingly well. She can't wait to be back in her garden.

Timmy is missing her, but he's doing ok. Of course, he's demanding triple cuddles when I'm home. And I try to give them to him.

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 12:21 am
by shireling
Hope your mom does well, Paddy :hug: :) . She's in my prayers.

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2018 11:02 am
by shireling
:cheers: :bday: Happy Birthday, emclelland! You kid, you :) ! :bday: :cheers:

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2018 12:37 pm
by Padfoot
Hello again!
First of all, thank you for the lovely cards. Mom enjoyed the birthday card. Anything computer related is a miracle to her. The surgery went well. Thank god, the tumor was benign. She had to stay at the hospital for a week, and when she was released, she could hardy wait to get back into her garden. But she had to learn that she has to take on things more slowly. She always wants to do more than she can actually manage.

My godchild Pauline is a schoolkid now. Her first day at schoo was September 11th, and she was soo proud. I couldn't be there, though - my colleague had asked for a few days off, and besides, it was during mom's stay at the hospital, so I wouldn't have been able to attend anyway. But I got the pictures and she looks lovely

We had a hard week. Our eldest, Lena (the girl with down syndrome), found her boyfriend dead in his flat (they didn't live together, but she spent most of the weekends with him). At first she thought he was taking a nap and she busied herself in the kitchen, fed the cat and did a little cleaning. But he didn't wake up so she checked again. That's when she realised he was all cold and stiff. So she went to the neighbour and together they checked again, then called his caregiver and the police. The post mortem revealed that he died of a massive stroke while he was sleeping. It must have happend Thursday night. Nobody could have done anything to help him. The caregiver said he had rarely seen someone acting as level-headed as Lena (and Larissa) and that her reaction (actually he said the reaction of both girls) had been absolutely exemplary. She called Larissa after she called the caregiver, and Larissa drove to see her immediately (my sister and her husband were on their way to the Netherlands for a week-long holiday. They turned to drive home immediately after they got the news, but had 5 hours of driving ahead of them and didn't get home until the late Friday evening). Larissa brought Lena to our place and we looked after them until she asked to go home. Mom went with them, and I picked her up after my sister and brother-in-law arrived. Of course, Lena was in shock, but she was also very composed. Daniel, her boyfriend, did have a heart condition, and he also suffered from strokes when he was a child, but he recovered reasonably well. His main handicap was that he was born with only one ear, and his sense of hearing wasn't fully developed. He couldn't stand many people around him, which made work in a larger location such as a sheltered workshop a problem - but he also had a problem with authority. Having met his father now, I know why.

The funeral took place on Wednesday. Lena was mildly sedated, so she was very composed. I like the vicar's sermon. He knew Daniel for almost 20 years, and he knew about his problems, which he mentioned. Then he said the parents (father and stepmom) would like to say a few words. The father jumped up and almost knocked the vicar over to get to the microphone. People thought he would like to say something about his son or maybe thanks for the condolences - but what followed was an evangelisation Billy-Graham-style. Had I not been seated, it would have knocked me off my shoes. I have barely met someone as cold and self-righteous as this man. He didn't give Lena so much as a glance (much less a friendly word) - but droned on about us poor sinners who should get up, come up to the front and make their decision for Jesus right now and right in front of the coffin. His wife stood beside him, not allowed to say a word, but one could clearly see that she wished the earth would open up and swallow her. Mom (who was seated outside the cemetary chapel, was appalled and upset, and when we left the chapel, I could see the same apprehension in most people's faces. The mothers (Daniels birth mother and his stepmothers) were both mourning and touched - both of them hugged Lena and cried with her and tried to comfort her - but this man completely ignored her. I have barely been repulsed by a person as much as I have been by this guy.

Lena has been on compassionate leave the last few days (she wanted to work, because it distracts her, but she broke down Wednesday morning), and my sister said that the father called and ordered (not asked!) her to come to the flat and get her things out. This will be hard for her.

It's a good thing she's going on holiday in two weeks - my sister and her family had given the trip to mom as a birthday present, and it was planned to take Lena and Larissa with them from the beginning. So she has something to look forward to. She's doing her best and keeping up very well, acting very composed, but she has barely slept the last week. My sister has taken to give her valerian, and it seems to help. At least she did sleep a little the last few nights. I hope for her sake she'll get over finding him. She told me, that she was glad it was her who found him. This way she was able to say goodbye to him. If anyone else had found him and she hadn't been able to see him, it would have made it even harder for her. She's a strong young lady.

The cat is at the animal shelter now. Mom and I discussed taking her in, in honour of Daniel and as a comfort to Lena, but since we got Timmy from a 2-cat-household and he wasn't glad there, and mom says since I'm away all day, and she doesn't feel up to deal with two cats (maybe fighting) in the house, we decided not to do so. Besides, she's an indoor cat only, and Timmy likes his freedom and loves to come and go as he pleases. It was a hard decision, nonetheless.

I'll be back tomorrow. I need to do some housework. His majesty is resting in my bed (this is my 2nd attempt to get here today, the 1st was prevented by him taking his usual place at the keyboard), but mom's downstairs, calling me..

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Sat Sep 22, 2018 1:39 pm
by shireling
Padfoot wrote:Hello again!
First of all, thank you for the lovely cards. Mom enjoyed the birthday card. Anything computer related is a miracle to her. The surgery went well. Thank god, the tumor was benign. She had to stay at the hospital for a week, and when she was released, she could hardy wait to get back into her garden. But she had to learn that she has to take on things more slowly. She always wants to do more than she can actually manage.

Oh, she's so welcome. I need - now that I've done this twice - to ask you your mom's name :paperbag: . I think that would be the best mannered thing I could do.

My godchild Pauline is a schoolkid now. Her first day at schoo was September 11th, and she was soo proud. I couldn't be there, though - my colleague had asked for a few days off, and besides, it was during mom's stay at the hospital, so I wouldn't have been able to attend anyway. But I got the pictures and she looks lovely

:yay:

We had a hard week. Our eldest, Lena (the girl with down syndrome), found her boyfriend dead in his flat (they didn't live together, but she spent most of the weekends with him). At first she thought he was taking a nap and she busied herself in the kitchen, fed the cat and did a little cleaning. But he didn't wake up so she checked again. That's when she realised he was all cold and stiff. So she went to the neighbour and together they checked again, then called his caregiver and the police. The post mortem revealed that he died of a massive stroke while he was sleeping. It must have happend Thursday night. Nobody could have done anything to help him. The caregiver said he had rarely seen someone acting as level-headed as Lena (and Larissa) and that her reaction (actually he said the reaction of both girls) had been absolutely exemplary. She called Larissa after she called the caregiver, and Larissa drove to see her immediately (my sister and her husband were on their way to the Netherlands for a week-long holiday. They turned to drive home immediately after they got the news, but had 5 hours of driving ahead of them and didn't get home until the late Friday evening). Larissa brought Lena to our place and we looked after them until she asked to go home. Mom went with them, and I picked her up after my sister and brother-in-law arrived. Of course, Lena was in shock, but she was also very composed. Daniel, her boyfriend, did have a heart condition, and he also suffered from strokes when he was a child, but he recovered reasonably well. His main handicap was that he was born with only one ear, and his sense of hearing wasn't fully developed. He couldn't stand many people around him, which made work in a larger location such as a sheltered workshop a problem - but he also had a problem with authority. Having met his father now, I know why.

The funeral took place on Wednesday. Lena was mildly sedated, so she was very composed. I like the vicar's sermon. He knew Daniel for almost 20 years, and he knew about his problems, which he mentioned. Then he said the parents (father and stepmom) would like to say a few words. The father jumped up and almost knocked the vicar over to get to the microphone. People thought he would like to say something about his son or maybe thanks for the condolences - but what followed was an evangelisation Billy-Graham-style. Had I not been seated, it would have knocked me off my shoes. I have barely met someone as cold and self-righteous as this man. He didn't give Lena so much as a glance (much less a friendly word) - but droned on about us poor sinners who should get up, come up to the front and make their decision for Jesus right now and right in front of the coffin. His wife stood beside him, not allowed to say a word, but one could clearly see that she wished the earth would open up and swallow her. Mom (who was seated outside the cemetary chapel, was appalled and upset, and when we left the chapel, I could see the same apprehension in most people's faces. The mothers (Daniels birth mother and his stepmothers) were both mourning and touched - both of them hugged Lena and cried with her and tried to comfort her - but this man completely ignored her. I have barely been repulsed by a person as much as I have been by this guy.

Lena has been on compassionate leave the last few days (she wanted to work, because it distracts her, but she broke down Wednesday morning), and my sister said that the father called and ordered (not asked!) her to come to the flat and get her things out. This will be hard for her.

It's a good thing she's going on holiday in two weeks - my sister and her family had given the trip to mom as a birthday present, and it was planned to take Lena and Larissa with them from the beginning. So she has something to look forward to. She's doing her best and keeping up very well, acting very composed, but she has barely slept the last week. My sister has taken to give her valerian, and it seems to help. At least she did sleep a little the last few nights. I hope for her sake she'll get over finding him. She told me, that she was glad it was her who found him. This way she was able to say goodbye to him. If anyone else had found him and she hadn't been able to see him, it would have made it even harder for her. She's a strong young lady.

:( :( :( I am so sorry. As I read these paragraphs, I'm struck by how much more along Germany is. The way Lena & Daniel have been treated is head and shoulders above much of what I've seen here. There are areas where folks like them and my son, are treated with dignity and respect, like the adults they are, but it varies widely. Oh, my heart goes out to her! Look for a card from me to Lena, Paddy. I'm so happy that you're considering having her with you.

The cat is at the animal shelter now. Mom and I discussed taking her in, in honour of Daniel and as a comfort to Lena, but since we got Timmy from a 2-cat-household and he wasn't glad there, and mom says since I'm away all day, and she doesn't feel up to deal with two cats (maybe fighting) in the house, we decided not to do so. Besides, she's an indoor cat only, and Timmy likes his freedom and loves to come and go as he pleases. It was a hard decision, nonetheless.

I'm so happy that you're considering having her with you. :( I sincerely hope her kitty finds a good home.

I'll be back tomorrow. I need to do some housework. His majesty is resting in my bed (this is my 2nd attempt to get here today, the 1st was prevented by him taking his usual place at the keyboard), but mom's downstairs, calling me..

:hug:

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Wed Oct 03, 2018 4:04 pm
by Padfoot
So much for "be back tomorrow"..

Thank you so much for your card. Lene happened to be here when it arrived, so I was able to show it to her, and she did like it. She's coping well, as far as we can tell. Mom, my sister and the girls are leaving for a short-term holiday at the Black Forst on Friday. It was a birthday gift to mom, and Lena is looking forward to it - probably most of all, because she needs to get away for a few days.

Apart from the holiday, we decided to meet once a week and go swimming together. It'll do both of us good. Those last few weeks have been so turbulent, we need some rest. All of us. I probably shouldn't say that, but I'm also looking forward to mom being away for three days. I do need some time for myself as well. Sometimes it does get a little bit much, for me as well.

Timmy is of course right beside me while I'm writing. Trust him to hear when I switch on the laptop, no matter where he is at that moment. It's a holiday today (Reunion Day), and I took the opportunity to iron the laundry of about 3 weeks. I'm glad I'm done with it now.

We hired a gardener to trim some trees in the garden. It's high time. Mom has been talking about it for years, and when we were gardening on Saturday, there was a gardener next door, so I went over and asked him if he'd come and have a look at our garden as well, and he agreed. I hope he'll come over within the next few days, so I can show him what to do. There's a lot of work waiting for him...

Mom's calling, I promised to help her cutting down the last of the tomato plants. The last few nights have been frosty, and it's about time to get prepared.

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2018 6:15 pm
by Padfoot
Lena and I have started our weekly swimming, and I get the impression that she likes it. I enjoy it as well.
Mom has been checked by the Medical Review Boards because we thought it might be a good idea to get her into care. She now has been graded into care level 1 (not much, but it's a start). At first she didn't really like the idea, but now she has realized that it wasn't such a bad idea.

Larissa has started her training as a medical technical assistant. Two days, and she's already complaing that she has to learn volumes :lol: :lol:

I have next week off, which I'm really looking forward to. I need to clean my car, inside and out, and I need to change tyres (Winter is coming!!)

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2018 6:21 pm
by Padfoot
There is so much wrong going on right now. Here, in our country as well.

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2018 11:39 pm
by shireling
Padfoot wrote:There is so much wrong going on right now. Here, in our country as well.


Ah, sweetie :hug: . There's more like the two of us, than there are of all like them - and they know who they are. It'll be okay.

Re: The Ivy Bush - General Chat

Posted: Fri Oct 19, 2018 6:36 pm
by shireling
We voted absentee last week, and, on the site, it says that our ballots have just been counted. I hope there's more like us out there.